so come on and fly with me as we make our great escape

its empty.
Wednesday, July 16, 2008 3:43 AM

its empty.

rooar.

im up now.gna rush out my crap homework that ive to hand up ltr onn..rooar.i wish i had done it earlier so tt now i can be enjoying my sleep..and i havent started studying for my tests!eeks!rooaarrr!

oh well.life's life.ive no motivation whatsoever.:(( boohoo.doublefrown.

its kinda nice now.like.up at this hour.although i absolutely dread it.bt yeahh.kinda nice.really quiet.and peaceful and all.just me and my itunes.

anywayy i talked to enna earlier onn whenn i met her..and yeahh it kinda cleared up my thinking.its kinda like what i feel coincides with what she thinks..so..that kinda like reminds me to like yeahh...okayy nvm.i aint making no sense yo.

and anywayy before that..like while waiting for enna.someone else called to remind me of 25th..rooar.

i feel like taking the damn next two weeks off or smthng.i mean like ive been feeling sick here and there.on and off.not cool.and like.i dnt feel like gg to sch.not now at least.i just wanna stay in my bedd and sleeep and nt be reminded of anything.ive been reflecting alot lately.ive been thinking what was me, what happened one year ago.and i remember clearly one year ago from today (16th july), i was with glenn.and we celebrated his bday at this park in sembawang.cooked him pasta.gave him tas.the box.i remember our bench.the tree.how we made it a vow that we would be there every year on the 15th and meet at the bench at 12 noon.and how 5years from that day last year.we would meet there.and that would be when he proposed after returned back from aussie.how i neglected my friends in sch ever i started dating.how i wasnt doing my work.wasnt mugging like in sec one and two.how i wasnt given my full commitment to anything else bt our relationship.how much tears there were.how when we graduated from sc, and i apologised to kayi ann aileen jacq for neglecting them, and then reading kayi's blog, where she wrote that she was pissed that i finally realised that i had been neglecting them and was sorry abt it.that was kinda sucky.bt yeahh.in the endd i dnt blame them.i still talk to them and all.bt for them not be able to forgive me cos of that, i dnt blame them.cos i know it myslef it was my fault too.and i dnt wanna make the same mistake again.bt im still gna stick to my personal choice of boyfriend over friends..

it sounds so naive.i know.and fyi.im so not missing him thats why im reflecting.its like yeahh, i miss him as a person that has been a part of my life.i missed what we had.bt i still remember the moments where i got angry and pissed with him.i was never really fair to him.and he was probably the one who i gave my love the most to.and after i decided to break with him, i felt that why bother to give so much into a relationship.afterall it may not be worth it.bt yet when i think abt it.it was worth it.in the endd.i was the one who wanted it to be over.not him.he tried.i didnt change my decision on it.and yeahh i guess he has finally moved on.thats great for him.and im really happy.and yeahh.he made me feel what it was like to love someone a whole darn lot and be loved even more back in return.and just give yourself endlessly in a relationship.i mean.like.where i am today.its cos of him.heh.not in whatever way you presume it to be.im not angry.im not sad abt it.im not regretting it.in the endd it was my personal choice to not study and instead spend time with him.oh well.that was then.now is now.im just rambling in circles.cos im feeling sore abt my whole i wanna get married at 21 and then have kids plann:(haahaha rooar!!!

rooar.i am officially sick:(

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